Do you know what it takes to please a woman in bed? Her needs may be more complicated than yours -- but once you master the basics, you'll delight her always.

Difficulty: Average

Time Required: just be patient

Here's How:

1.   Take your time. You may be raring to go, but understand that it physically takes her body longer than yours to become aroused.

2.   Don't skip the foreplay. Caress her slowly, beginning perhaps with a non-genital massage. Work up to her erotic areas slowly; she'll indicate when she's ready for things to heat up.

3.   Discover her erogenous zones. Some women love to have their nipples stroked or sucked, others don't. Find out where she likes to be touched -- and don't frustrate her by doing something elsewhere that won't please her.

4.   Understand that she may be self-conscious about her body. If so, don't criticize her figure or the size of her breasts. In fact, don't call attention to her body at all. Enjoy her body with your eyes and hands, not your words.

5.   Introduce her to the pleasures of oral sex. She's likely to find the intensity of the experience most satisfying if you locate her clitoris and stroke it with your tongue in a way that brings her to climax.

6.   Know how her body works. Have you found her g-spot? Can she use her Kegel muscles during intercourse? Is she capable of multiple orgasms? All of these are wonderful to find out.

7.   Try sex positions that maximize her pleasure. Women-on-top positions generally afford the kind of contact that delivers the best results.

8.   Smell great. Not perfumed, just clean and manly.

9.   Make birth control a mutual responsibility. Don't leave it up to her -- unless she requests you do so.

10.   Mind your manners: Ladies first. Whenever possible, see to it that she orgasms before you do. And if she tells you it's not going to happen that night, accept it. There's always tomorrow... or a little bit later.

Tips:

1. Tell her you love her. When the feeling comes over you, say it out loud. She'll know how much you genuinely mean it. 
2. A small token of affection is always appreciated. A flower, a book, a love note all tell her how much you're thinking of her and how precious she is to you.

Extraterrestrial beings visited planet Earth and left their calendar and a message to the human civilization, Russian mathematician Vladimir Pakhomov believes. "I did not find the message from aliens by accident. I was searching for it, because I was sure that they had visited our planet," the scientist said.

A lot of specialists paid attention to several coincidences, which they could find in peoples' legends and tales, particularly in those stories, which told of extraterrestrial beings visiting Earth in ancient times.

Explorer and traveler, Erich von Daeniken, wrote that it was extremely difficult for humans to find aliens' traces on Earth. The global ocean takes two-thirds of the planet's surface, ice covers the planet on its poles, vast deserts and immense woods occupy the rest of the planet's territory. The explorer supposed that aliens, if they had ever landed on Earth, would of course have to think, what kind of a message they could leave on the planet so that it could be saved through thousands of ages.

Scientist Vladimir Pakhomov believes that aliens probably decided to leave their calendar on the planet. Egyptian pharaohs, for example, were taking a rather strange oath when they were acceding to the throne: they promised not to make even slightest changes in the calendar.

A lot of ancient manuscripts tell of the god of wisdom that was known under two names - Thoth and Hermes. Legends say that the god wrote and hid certain "books" before he returned to heaven. Researcher Graham Hancock wrote in his book, "Heaven's Mirror" that the books of the god of wisdom remained imperishable and invisible through the centuries. Legends say that the god did not want humans to find and read the books, for the human race did not deserve such an honor.

The humanity did not have the necessary knowledge and technologies to read the aliens' calendar, but the latter existed on the planet anyway. "I was shocked with the matrix of the eternal calendar, which was found on the walls of the Sophia Cathedral in Kiev, Ukraine. The matrix makes it possible to determine the calendar structure of any year. For example, you can easily find out the day of your birthday in a hundred years with the help of this eternal calendar," Pakhomov said. The scientist used the calendar of the Sophia Cathedral as the starting point to decipher ancient cryptograms.

Two women attempted to experience sexual pleasure from an intimate contact with a cat. The weird endeavor ended rather sad for one of the women: she was hospitalized with severe genital injuries.

Doctors arrived to hospitalize a woman, who had suffered from unexpected bleeding, as they were told on the phone. They saw a woman lying on the sofa. The woman was wearing only a jumper. Streaks of blood could be seen on her legs.

The woman's friend was speechless to explain what happened. The woman was taken to the gynecological department of the local hospital, where doctors determined the unusual character of the genital injuries. Stitching the wounds, they supposed that a sex maniac had attacked the woman and injured her in the crotch.

The truth, however, surpassed all expectations. When the woman recovered, she confessed that she had been injured during her love act with a cat. The woman's name was Svetlana. Her husband, an entrepreneur, was constantly away on business trips. That day he was out of town too. Svetlana was bored and she decided to visit her friend, Vera.

The two women had some wine and started talking about intimate matters. Vera was the first, who suggested trying something totally unusual: "Do you wanna try the real thing?" asked she. When Vera clarified, what the real thing was about, Svetlana was terrified. However, the idea seemed to be attractive to her after the women talked about it and had some more wine.

"Life is too short, one has to try everything!" Svetlana decided. Vera brought in a cat. The cat named as Timka was living in the house for quite a long time. Vera took her clothes off, put the light out and played an adult movie on the video recorder. She lied down, took a bottle of valerian and poured some on her most intimate body part. When the cat smelled valerian, he started licking it away, putting Vera in the state of ecstasy.

"Now it is your turn, you try," Vera told Svetlana when she was done. "You know, my friend, there is nothing better than the cat's little tongue," said she. When the cat started licking valerian off from Svetlana, something happened to the animal. Timka probably took too much of the medication: he started licking the liquid away but all of a sudden he seized the genitals of the poor woman with his claws and teeth.

Svetlana screamed and tried to push the fierce pet lover away from her, but the cat wouldn't let go. Vera hurried to help her friend: she emptied a bucket of water on the cat and threw the animal out of the house. When she saw that Svetlana was bleeding, she called an ambulance. When Svetlana returned home from the hospital, she had to tell the story to her husband, Boris. The man could not take the fact that his wife preferred having oral sex with a cat: Boris kicked Svetlana out of the house and the abandoned woman had to stay with her mother. The offended man is not going to forgive his wife: the couple is currently divorcing. It is noteworthy that lonely women often use their pets (cats or dogs, regardless of sex) to satisfy their sexual needs. Such pet adventures often lead to lamentable consequences - not for pets, but for orgasm-craving women, as a rule. An overdose of valerian can make the loveliest cat become a fierce and aggressive animal.

Malaysian priests find little puppy with six legs and two penises



The ongoing aggravation of the ecological situation in the world often results in the appearance of unusual creatures, some of which prove to be rather viable. The news about human or animal babies born with striking physical deformities always attract people's attention, in spite of the fact that such news reports appear on a regular basis.

A little puppy with six legs and two penises has been recently found in a Malaysian temple, in the town of Pandamaran, situated to the south off Kuala Lumpur. According to eyewitnesses, the custodian of the temple found the puppy sleeping near the entrance to the shrine. The man picked the animal up to remove it from the passage, when he noticed that it was a weird many-legged little dog, a six-legged dog, to be more precise.

When the strange finding was examined in the shrine, it turned out that the fluffy creature also had two penises. That was probably the reason why the priests named the dog as Ong Fatt, which translates as Lucky.

Inexplicable anomalies happen rather frequently in the natural world nowadays. A six-legged lamb was born in Holland; a dog gave birth to six normal puppies and one six-legged creature in Brazil.

The puppy named as Lucky currently lives in the shrine, where it was found. Malaysian priests believe that their talisman was sent to them from heaven.

 

SNIFFING glue started out as a playful diversion for Jamal, but the innocuous gold-coloured substance eventually took over his life.  

"I started at 16," he said. "I did not even like glue in the beginning and sniffing it gave me such a bad headache, but my friends kept giving it to me. I began to like the effects, especially after a bad day in school or at home. 

"After 10 minutes of inhaling the glue, I felt like I was in a world of my own. I could talk to the trees. I felt like I could interact with nature. I saw spaceships landing and spoke to aliens in my fantasies." 

It was so easy to be drawn into glue sniffing, said Jamal, now 28. He is currently undergoing rehabilitation at Rumah Pengasih. 

"Glue is cheap, and we could buy it easily in Ipoh. I bought it at the hardware shops, and even in supermarkets. Police nabbed me four times, but they had to let me go because nothing shows in the urine samples." 

He left home even before taking his SPM examinations because of fights with his parents over his glue sniffing habit. After he started working, he began taking marijuana but he still preferred sniffing glue. 

Glue had such an insidious hold on him, said Jamal, that he became devoid of fears. 

"A glue sniffer died in one of the ports. We all rushed there to look at him. His lungs had crashed, and there was blood coming out of his nose and ears. It scared me, but only for two weeks. 

"Then I was back to sniffing glue. I could not stay away for long because my mind would be thinking only of getting a fix, and my body hurt. 

"I reached a stage where I'd have memory lapses. I'd be somewhere and have no idea where I was and how I got there. I was forgetful, and my responses were slow, lambat pick up. Inhaling glue takes up a lot of energy, and I'd be sleeping most of the time." 

At his lowest point, Jamal tried to commit suicide by drinking thinner. 

He acknowledged that he was fortunate because he had not suffered more dire consequences from 10 years of sniffing glue and using marijuana. 

"I lost my job, and after that I felt I could not go on leading that kind of life. My parents then offered to put me in Rumah Pengasih. I have been here for 18 months. 

"I won't go back to glue sniffing ? it's for teenagers." 

This one goes to someone from my neighborhood who alerted me about my car headlights that wasn't switched off for more than 3 hours last night.

May God bless him always.  I don't know how this good man managed to track me on the fourth floor, considering I am quite new (been here for one and a half months only)  in that neighborhood.
 

This is interesting. After Reading THIS, you'll NEVER look at a banana in the same way again.

Bananas. Containing three natural sugars - sucrose, fructose and glucose combined with fiber, a banana gives an instant, sustained and substantial boost of energy.

Research has proven that just two bananas provide enough energy for a strenuous 90-minute workout. No wonder the banana is the number one fruit with the world's leading athletes.

But energy isn't the only way a banana can help us keep fit. It can also help overcome or prevent a substantial number of illnesses and conditions, making it a must to add to our daily diet.

Did some unpacking yesterday and found this CD - Born At The Right Time by Paul Simon.  About 14 years ago, I won the contest (can't remember which newspapers) ... Paul Simon concert in Singapore ... 10 November 1991.

I've lost contact with my buddy who went to this concert ... anyone knows Mr. Hazizan bin Bulat, please contact me. 



The ticket was signed two of PS guitarists; Ray Phiri and John Selolwane.  Couldn't get Paul Simon himself to sign this ticeket or CD.